i'd embrace you before i left.
I’m clairvoyant, which means through painting/drawing, I can access the plane of the dead. The pieces I make are bodies. The bristol paper is the skeleton, built up with skin of graphite and ink, stretched taut in bondage over their surfaces. The bodies become my own. I seek to send these bodies to a different plane of existence to grapple with my suicidal ideation, to send the bodies to a plane without the urgency of suicide. The pieces may never reach this plane, but they bring me closer to understanding how death affects my body. My fascination with clairvoyance has led me to seek methods for communicating with bodies on other planes. This manifested in an obsession with the magic eight ball. I am hunting for answers better than the ones I got about my suicidality. The magic eight ball may not provide these answers, instead providing guidance in the process of making. I ask yes or no questions about the work, it answers and I obey it. Through this process of creating the work I find glimpses of answers about my suicidal ideation, continuing to shake the magic 8 ball violently in search of them.
Bio
lilith lux batty is a New England based multimedia painter and poet. Her work focuses on her personal experiences with queer identity and mental illness, with an emphasis on camp, collage, and text. She is the author of two self published poetry books entitled Uncle Mommy, Girl Sin and Calla Lilies. She is also a bimbo who loves breakfast food, the Twilight Saga, and fantasizing about horrific ways to meet a bloody demise.
